Monday, October 1, 2012

Ego.

I like a lot of things. I think this comes as a challenge to me because I am moderately interested in A LOT, so focusing on one thing to make it a passion can be difficult. I don't want to spread myself too thin, and I have a history of picking up hobbies and doing them half-hearted only to be restricted by my other interests.

This doesn't sound like a bad thing, right? Well it's not really. I mean I like and tolerate a lot. I am usually up for any sort of adventure with friends and my boyfriend. I like being active outdoors, playing in mud, hiking, swimming, boating, fishing, bicycling, camping, playing with my dog. I like being indoors and playing video games, reading a good book, colouring, painting, and even (as of yesterday) learning to crochet! I also love shopping, make-up, going for drives, coffee, cooking, nail polish and re-doing furniture. Seems pretty balanced, no?

But honestly, outside of my loved ones and my dog, I can't really say I have found a passion. Something that I am REALLY good at, or something that I desire to be exceptional at. That is a problem for me! When I try something new, and I am only moderately ok at it, I am very quick to give up on myself and move to the next task. I struggle with not excelling at things I try. I know, this is absolutely ridiculous. Nobody is great at something the first time they try it. Nobody. It's not like I need to be told this and it will help me, because I know it already. I know that practice makes perfect, but when I practice I am very hard on myself. If I do not get the results I am aiming for I just file it in the "tried it but whatever" file in my brain.

So, with my new flavour of the month, crocheting I am really looking to get past that. I want to be great at it. I want to excel at something for myself. I want to push past my self-doubt and fear of failure to create something beautiful, if only for myself.

Though I have a project planned. It's lofty and I know that is where my problems can come from, but this project is for a friend I care deeply about. I hope that I can get past my ego and just get down to it! It's a personal challenge.

What do you do that you're great at?

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1 comment:

  1. I actually totally get this. I mean, no one is good at anything right out of the gate BUT if I am not "feeling it" at the very beginning then I usually check out.

    I think you are just waiting to find that one thing and that is quite cool.

    The only thing I am good at is driving. I am a good driver. That's it. Everything else is meh.

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