Monday, October 29, 2012

Bayer's A1C Now Meter

So due to my recent post about my frustrations with getting in to see my doctor, I decided to take things into my own hands and purchase the $47 A1C Now machine from Bayer.  Admittedly it comes with two tests, so I will do this again in January and hope for another significant drop. (Excuse my awful photos)

What's significant you say? I had a recent A1C done, before I got my new pump,  and it was 8.4%. That is out of my personal target range. (Your diabetes may vary). I wanted to lower it significantly. So I set out on a personal mission to do it. Since the day I started my new pump, I have felt good and my sugars have been relatively in range. I don't have the swings I used to have and I fully believe that I didn't TRULY understand the insulin pump until I started to spend hours a day researching it and its effect on diabetes. ANYWAY......

The box it came in.

It was intimidating. I didn't want to waste almost $50 on this, and there are a lot of steps. It came with a teeny tiny DVD, and I have one of those new fangled dvd players which doesn't have the eject tray so I decided to be hardcore and go by the written directions only. That little white rectangle? That's a torture device. It's supposed to be a finger poker but I claim it to be a spawn of Satan and just went ahead and used my lovely, sweet, angelic Delica poker. Then I had to poke myself 5 times because a) I don't change my lancet because I need to maintain my d-street cred. and b)this thing takes A LOT of blood. Like, at least 5-6 times what my little Verio takes.
A scary sight.              




It takes 5 minutes. When I first put the blood in the thingy I thought I screwed it up and I gave a significantly evil glare to my laptop for not having an old school DVD player, and then it started to count down. It looked like this:






 And then something magical happened. I had my lowest A1C result in my entire life with diabetes. It was 6.7% That is a GREAT leap forward. I can't wait to see if I can get it in the low 6's or high fives by January.
In my opinion, it was worth the $47, and I will probably continue to do this 4x a year. I feel so good about the painstaking hours I have put into this disease and I am incredibly motivated to keep going. It's incredible what a simple number can do to motivate me. 

So blurry, and literally the only picture I took cause I jumped up out of excitement.

Saturday, October 27, 2012

Quest Protein Bars: A Full Review











Note: after my initial post about Quest Protein Bars, the company graciously sent me a box with one of every one of their flavours to do a full review. When the company contacted me, I informed them that I will accept the box, if they remained fully aware that I will post my positive and negative opinions of the product. The company agreed, and were super friendly about it. The product arrived from California well packaged in less than 4 days. Speedy shipping and great service!!

So! I love this product for the most part. My rating system will be pretty simple, they all have relatively the same ingredients so I will base my ratings solely on the flavour of each different bar. I have had the same outcome on my blood sugars/hunger for each bar so I don't think I need to explain what happened with each bar.

My rating for the flavours will be out of five stars :) The single stars are the flavours that I actually didn't want to finish. I didn't enjoy them at all. The 2 stars a I finished but wasn't a huge fan, 3 stars means I somewhat enjoyed it and 4 and 5 means I thoroughly enjoyed them, with 5 being the ones that I have bought again.

Vanilla Almond Crunch : *****
Chocolate Peanut Butter: ****
Coconut Cashew:*****
Lemon Cream Pie:****
Apple Pie:**
Cinnimon Roll:***
Chocolate Brownie:**
Strawberry Cheesecake:**
Mixed Berry Bliss:*
Peanut Butter Supreme:*
Peanut Butter and Jelly:****


These bars are not cheap. On the Quest website they are $2.39 each. In the local nutrition store they are $3.59 each, but in my opinion, they are a totally worthy meal replacement. They are gluten free, high fiber and low carb. Anyone who has tried to get me to drink a protein shake or eat a protein bar (HI MOM!) Knows that I hate the stuff. I hate food that tastes fake, and I am  I hate when I can taste artificial sweeteners and artificial flavours and my pallet is very sensitive to those. The one stars above tasted very fake to me.

The fibre content is 17g across the board, and the fibre comes from IMO. Here's what the QUEST site says about the type of fibre they use:


In order for Quest Bars to be usable as a complete meal, we wanted to ensure that they contained enough fiber to really matter. Almost every ounce of carbohydrate in our bars comes from fiber, which will keep your insulin levels low and your stomach satisfied. Fiber has been shown to do many things such as controlling hunger, improving digestive health and preventing certain diseases.
IMO is a 100% natural fiber derived from plant sources that is very similar to the better known chicory root fiber. The two fiber sources are almost identical in taste, feel and texture but with one minor exception: IMO does not cause any intestinal upset whatsoever even for people with very sensitive stomachs. We use it to make sure that Quest bars can be complete meals for use whenever you want something convenient.

I do find myself extremely full after eating one of these. I ate them most commonly as breakfast since eating carbs in the morning tends to destroy my bgs. The low carb content combined with the high fiber and high protein (20g) made for an absolutely delicious meal that helped my blood sugars stabilize at a time that I was seriously struggling with dawn phenomenon.

They are gluten free too! I am not celiac or gluten sensitive as far as I know, so this normally doesn't mean a lot to me, but this was definitely a big deal to my pal who came to visit awhile ago. He was hungry and I offered him one of these for breakfast (strawberry cheesecake) and he LOVED it. He loved it so much he kept his wrapper to buy more. Where the diabetes community is prone to digestive issues, these bars are great for us! They are easy on the stomach, mostly delicious, and digestible.

As for my favourite: a definite toss up between vanilla almond and coconut cashew. I love nuts and I love vanilla, and I love coconut so these flavours just made sense for me. I have them stashed in my purse, my lunch bag, desk at work, gym bag, bicycle paniers....everywhere.

I highly suggest these if you're active or struggling with post meal highs. It may take a few tries to get a flavour that you really like, but like any food that is actually good for you......that's how it is.

Over all I give Quest Protein Bars a 4/5 stars.




Friday, October 26, 2012

Fabulous Fiver Friday: F(ph)oto Edition

Here is my Fabulous Fiver Friday, a Photo Edition:

I found this gum: It has mint and bubble gum flavours (my two faves), a Jane Austen quote AND a mirror to check your teeth.


THIS is how my day has been so far! Ahhhhh yes! Hard work is paying off:


I get to go hiking with this guy tomorrow:



The C8 Medisensor got approved in Europe today. DUDES. DUDES. This is MINDBLOWING.  NON INVASIVE 24/hr glucose monitoring. the artificial pancreas is JUST AROUND THE CORNER. Now if Health Canada approves it or maybe even the freaking Dexcom I will do a happy dance.


I am starting this scarf for my friend: 








Thursday, October 25, 2012

Guest Post: Every Breath Counts

Alanna's note: I asked Kerri to write a post for the blog based on her life with chronic illness. She is not living with diabetes, however she is living with asthma. She is an awesome support for the d-community and is a health advocate. You can find Kerri on twitter at: @__kerri.


Chronic disease of any sort comes with a lot of commonalities—regardless, of what disease we may live with on a daily basis, we are all constantly paying attention, even if with only some small segment of our minds, to how we are feeling at a given moment, and what actions we must take to deal with those feelings—whether those are physical or emotional.

Though I have a lot of friends with diabetes, I have a fully functional pancreas. The thing I have to think about, though, is simply breathing. I was diagnosed with asthma in April 2008 after a series of misdiagnoses and rounds of useless antibiotics for an infection I never actually had (that’s fun, right?).  Ultimately, we eventually figured out was going on, and through a series of trials and errors for about three years, we finally came across a combination of medications that keep things in relatively good control.

Like any chronic disease, asthma comes with its own series of misconceptions within society—the “blue puffer” is not a cure-all, anxiety and asthma are not the same thing, and unlike the doctor who told me I might have asthma said . . . “Take your inhaler and you’ll be okay” is not 100% true 100% of the time (I now take up to four inhalers multiple times a day, to give some perspective).  Fortunately we have moved away from a lot of the asthma-related stereotypes of the past, such as that kids/people with asthma can’t participate in physical activity (and thank goodness that misconception has changed!). More than societal perception change about asthma, what matters is how we as people living with any chronic disease perceive our disease.

I’ve long since said that “asthma may be a speed bump, but it is never a roadblock”. I think this holds true for many chronic diseases—an increase in asthma symptoms may affect how long it takes me to do something, just as a low blood sugar might affect how long it takes someone with diabetes to do something. We may have to change how we do things, but our disease does not have to change what we choose to do.

We choose how we see our own disease—whether we see it as a hindrance (which is inevitable, of course) or we can transform that perspective to see it as a stepping-stone . . . or, in some cases, a catapult towards better things: a motivator for making better choices to keep ourselves as healthy as possible; a way to increase our own knowledge about ourselves and about others; a story we can share to help the world see things a little bit differently.

I am not my asthma—“I am not my disease at all” (to quote Tess Dunn). But asthma is a part of me, and it has shaped who I am growing, day by day in this journey, to be. It has lead me through tough times, no doubt about that, but it has also lead me to many, many amazing people and experiences that I wouldn’t trade for the world. It has changed how I think about things, how I feel about things, and how I see things—and part of that change comes down to choice. I didn’t choose to have asthma. I do choose how I think, feel, see and experience things.  And in the words of Bryce Avary . . . “Life will write the words, but you choose your own melody […] I’m just trying to find the right notes.”

Monday, October 22, 2012

Lance and the Livestrong Foundation

I was going to write my wrap up of JDRF Family Camp and explain how amazing it was and how it is truly beneficial to those living with diabetes (or caretakers of people with diabetes). It was great and I will definitely be doing that post soon.

However today it was officially announced that the International Cycling Union is stripping Lance Armstrong of his winning Tour de France medals. I have looked up to Lance and the Livestrong Foundation not only has a cyclist but as a child of someone who has battled cancer for at least the past year.

To start: I truly believe Lance Armstrong's story and the Livestrong Foundation helped save my father's life last year. He is an inspiration to athletes who are battling cancer and my father was one of those. His book is heart touching, well written, and inspirational. His Foundation has raised more than 15 billion dollars for Cancer research. He started this because he wanted to inspire and empower people dealing with cancer diagnosis.



I don't think that Lance is completely in the right though. I think that doping is stupid, wrong and should be considered and offense in all sports, no questions asked. Please do not take my opinion on what he has done with his celebrity to be one that condones how he achieved the celebrity in the first place. Before his battle with cancer he was good, but not great so I get it. I know why he was stripped of the medals.

But to be a member of the media, or even a lay person criticizing his every move in the sport? Get over yourselves. Every single cyclist in the Tour de France dopes, they just don't get caught. It's a dirty, cheat-filled sport, and that's common knowledge to people who pay attention to it.

Here's how I see the progression:

-Lance races Tour a few times remains good middle to high end of pack.
-Lance battles cancer and wins
-Lance returns with incredible vigor and beats others 7 times over by more than 15meters (almost unheard of) raising suspicion.
-While others are trying to figure out his doping scheme, Lance starts up the Livestrong Foundation by using his name which he gained by winning aforementioned titles
-Livestrong continues to grow and raise 15 billion dollars
-Lance steps down from Foundation chair
-Lance is stripped of medals.

So, is what he did during the races wrong? Yup. More wrong than any of his competitors? Nope.

Did he use what he gained from those wins for good? Absolutely.

I honestly believe my father would not be alive, healthy and cycling 20+ kms if it wasn't for Lance's fame gained form those medals, the Livestrong Foundation and the Nike endorsement.

I think it's a sad day for Lance and the sport in general. I think this is going to snowball. At least it should if they are going to remain transparent and maintain a heavy hand against doping. The sad thing is, it's my favourite sport and I really did respect Lance as an athlete before all of this. Now I respect Lance the philanthropist--something I hope nobody continues to try and take from him.

Thank you Mr. Armstrong, for what you have done for Cancer research.

Friday, October 19, 2012

Family Camp & Big Blue Test

Edit: It's Fabulous Fiver Friday, and I only previously Posted two awesome things! See below for the other 3 :)


1) JDRF Family Camp- I will be relatively brief today and won't be posting again until I return from JDRF Family Camp Weekend. I am so excited to be volunteering and role modelling for kids living with Type One Diabetes! We will be super active and be having a great time. I can't wait! Here is a quick blurb from the JDRF website about family camp for those who have asked

JDRF Family Camp
Thanks to a grant from the IWK Community Grants program and our industry partners, Lifescan and Animas, JDRF Nova Scotia is pleased to offer our very first Family Camp for youth ages 5-12 living with T1D and their families. The first Family Camp will be held on Friday, October 19 – Sunday, October 21, 2012, at Brigadoon Village.
Relationships are the heart of Family Camp. Families with a newly diagnosed child can connect with those who have experience living with diabetes in the family. They can share ideas, strategies, and knowledge, while developing long-term support networks.
The program includes sessions for adults, education sessions with qualified presenters, and facilitated small group discussions for children and their siblings. One of the goals of Family Camp is for children to gain confidence in managing their health, as diabetes is also a part of daily life of their fellow campers.
Family activities will include: orienteering, canoeing, arts and crafts, field games, talent/no talent show, and campfire cookouts. The emphasis is on fun and connecting with other families!
Camp fees include all meals, activities and accommodations:
Family Fee (up to 4 people): $200.00
Additional family member: $25.00
Children 2 and under: FREE



2)Big Blue Test/ Diabetes Hands Foundation- Also I have taken part in my first Big Blue Test and intend to do it with every other activity I do this weekend. I will also pass the info on to the families I see. The Big Blue Test is doing great things as is Manny at the Diabetes Hands Foundation .

The Big Blue test is a fundraising and awareness initiative set out to demonstrate how only 14 minutes of exercise can reduce our blood glucose. On top of that, if  20,000 tests are logged before November 14th, $100,000 will be donated to diabetes-related nonprofits. It's a win-win-win situation. I hope you all get out and do a Big Blue Test, diabetic or not :) Have a great weekend! I know I will!

3)I slept a straight 8 hours last night
4)My dog and I found a single daisy on our walk today, even after two frosts! I LOVE daisies.
5)The boil water on our water was lifted today! No more pouring bottled water out to brush our teeth and do dishes :)

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Uhmmmmm barfy wordless Wednesday.

Well today I thought I would give my belly a try for an infusion site after resting for two months. Clearly it was too soon.

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

What can diabetes educators/HCP learn from the DOC?

I could write a book on this topic. In fact, I just might some day.

There are things that I turn to the DOC (diabetes online community) for that my health care team do not have, and the more I network, chat and (may I say it..) befriend members of the DOC far and wide, the more I learn that they can provide me exactly the things I have been lacking the past 23 years.


1-Support and Understanding. This is my number one issue with my Health Care Team.

I have NEVER once been told "diabetes is hard and you're doing what you can." Never. I have always been blamed, been told my diabetes is out of control, called a "difficult case", a "brittle" diabetic. I have been prescribed every medication under the sun for blood sugar control, suggested that I get lap-band surgery, accused of lying about my exercise regime....you name it...it has been said to me, on top of that when I have reported it to outside sources I have been told "that's just how I take things" and "i always see things in such a negative light". When you live with a chronic illness that is portrayed in the media & public as your fault, you need somewhere to turn where people will not judge you, will not accuse you, but will guide you to better choices. I have found this in the DOC. While the DOC can not prescribe me things, look through my blood work, or do other medical tasks, I get the support and understanding I need from them to keep going every single day.

People who live with diabetes know more about the disease than anyone else. You can spend your entire life researching the disease and its scientific effects on the body, but until you truly live and feel it you are an outsider to it. I love the people in my life who help me. My boyfriend, my parents and my friends are always supporting me and listening to me talk about diabetes and what is happening in my d-life, they provide another layer of support and understanding. But the medical team I have (aside from my pump rep and my CDE who I rarely get a chance to see...) could use a little training in this area.

Which brings me to my next point

2- Timing My second major issue with my Health Care Team that the DOC gets right.

Diabetes is a 24/7 365 day a year disease. It doesn't take a break, a holiday or a vacation. It doesn't take a sick day, it doesn't go away. It's here to stay....forever. So why is it that when I feel I really need some specialized medical advice that I have to wait 6 months? Why is there no email, twitter, facebook, web page, phone number set up so someone who is in a diabetes crisis or in desperate need of advice can turn to it? People with diabetes who need advice on how to micro-tune a night time basal should not have to wait NINE MONTHS to figure this out.

It sounds like I am exaggerating, but I am not. Not one bit! Thankfully I have a few diabetes specialist nurses and endocrinologists who follow me on twitter and are members of the DOC. They offered me some advice! Over twitter! For free! FROM ANOTHER COUNTRY. Amazing. AMAZING. Thank YOU DOC. Guess what? For the past week my morning blood sugars have been between 4.9 (88) and 6.2 (111). Before that I was running in the low 3 (55ish)'s all night and mornings and then bouncing back to 15 (270)+ mid-morning. Can you believe that I haven't had a blood sugar over 13.3 (239) in TWO WEEKS? That sugar was only because I needed an infusion set change!

3- Empowerment I am EMPOWERED by the DOC. Members of the diabetec online community are the first to know about new technology and treatments. They tell everyone about it. They tell if it works for them why or why not. they talk about how you can take your health into your own hands. When I am having a bad day I am told by members of the DOC from all over the world to keep going, and that I am not alone. I am reminded that I am responsible for my diabetes, but everyone carries a bit of responsibility for each other. I am empowered to make choices for myself and seek out how to make these choices work. The DOC has helped me find my voice to speak up and out about this disease.

In closing:
I am forever grateful and humbled by the DOC. The experiences we share in 140 characters or less are astounding, ground breaking and eye opening. Learning how people all over the world are dealing with the same issues I fight with every day has motivated me to care as much about my health as my loved ones do. I can not and will not give up....even if my health care team says I have to for 6-9 months.





This post is my October entry in the DSMA Blog Carnival.  If you’d like to participate too, you can get all of the information at http://diabetessocmed.com/2012/october-dsma-blog-carnival-2/

Monday, October 15, 2012

Reminder

Despite diabetes, I have to remember to abide by my own rules, I have to remember to live the life I was given to the fullest. I have to remember to live myself first. I have to remember to laugh at the struggles that try and challenge me. It's a cheesy, kitschy saying. I caught my reflection in the mirror today and I noticed how close I placed my infusion set to my tattoo. Sometimes I forget I have this tattoo, sometimes I need to remember why I got it.

Friday, October 12, 2012

Fabulous Fiver Friday

Five Fabulous Things, my new Friday tradition.

1) I registered for my very first Connected In Motion event, Winter Slipstream 2013!!!! I am going to be somewhere in Ontario in January doing things with other T1 diabetics (like possibly snow frisbee, high ropes, skating and snowshoeing!) I am SO excited, I can't even begin to explain my excitement and it's like...four months away.
Here's a video from last year:



You should get in touch with these people if you have diabetes. They do AWESOME things and I am so excited to finally attend an event of theirs. You can find them at the website: www.connectedinmotion.ca or on  twitter @ConnectedInMotion

2) I have a massage booked today. I have been carrying a lot of tension around in my shoulders and I can not wait to get it fixed.

3)This is pretty amazing.

4)My blood sugar before lunch today is a solid 4.1 mmol/L or 74 mg/dcl! Yay!

5)My parents are coming down next week as well as the Mr.'s. We will be eating a meal together. I suspect it will either be like an episode of the Brady Bunch or All In The Family. I guess we will see.

What are your Five Fabulous Friday Facts?

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

The Day of the Girl

There are a few things happening in my life that I do not wish to post on a very public blog, but they are bringing me down.I am very conscious of how my mood affects those around me, those who love me, and those I interact with on a daily basis. I try very hard to sort my emotions (especially negative) out before unloading on someone. I am well aware that everyone is fighting a battle every day and while the issues I may be struggling with may seem significant to me, to others they are so insignificant, it may be a waste of breath to express myself. The thing is, my funk is caused by things out of my control right now, so I will ride the wave and move along.

This past weekend we celebrated Thanksgiving in Canada. The weekend was long for me, and I always enjoy the holiday. I love cooking. Like...a lot. I take great pride in my above-average cooking skills, and my boyfriend happens to love eating so it goes well together. Thanksgiving to me is a time to really take time and reflect on what makes me happy, what I need to work on and of course...what I am thankful for.

I should have written this post before my rant about my doctor issues the other day, but sometimes verbal diarrhea takes over.

Anyway I am truly thankful to be Canadian. I am not a person to be patriotic, or nationalistic, but I mean that in the way that indicated I am happy to be a part of a tiny part of the human population that has access to clean water, warmth, medication, doctors etc. I am thankful that I don't have to worry about getting shot when I go outdoors, or that someone will take my rights away from me over night.

I am thankful that I am a woman. I am thankful that I have pushed myself as hard as I did to learn the things I have and even more thankful that through these times that I am in a funk I push myself to learn more.

Two things I want to share on the eve of The Day Of The Girl:

This is from Pinterest, but originally posted at Dress a Day

You don't have to be pretty. You don't owe prettiness to anyone. Not to your boyfriend/spouse/partner, not to your co-workers, especially not to random men on the street. You don't owe it to your mother, you don't owe it to your children, you don't owe it to civilization in general. Prettiness is not a rent you pay for occupying a space marked 'female'.--Diana Vreeland





Also just another thing that happened today and actually made the news (I say that because it happens EVERY day and it doesn't always make the news): Malala Yousafzai was shot in the head yesterday for speaking out against Islam and its regulations against women being educated. An Islamist militant group not only shot her in the head, but declared that if she survived they will not give up. She is 14 years old.

14.

When I was 14 I would kick and scream if I didn't get $3 to get the new Bop Magazine, and this woman is speaking out because she wants the right to be able to READ a magazine.

You can read the article on the BBC here

So, yeah. I am thankful that I won't get shot in the head for wanting to learn. My funk isn't so bad in comparison. Excuse me while I finish of my whiskey and ginger in the bath.

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

RFP** for a doctor

It's officially fall, folks. Chilly dark mornings with lots of layers.

This fall I am in need of an appointment with my endo. I will preface this by saying: my last visit to the local endocrinology clinic was ABYSMAL. I waited 4.5 hours to see my endocrinologist who had an incredibly ignorant student with her, and paid little attention to me. I lost a half days of work and was basically just told to lose weight because my diabetes was "brittle". Despite my teary visit previous, I called the office, and was promptly (and rudely) told that there is a 6-9 month waiting list. I expressed my displeasure as I had been there in April and was sent for some tests and was asked by my endocrinologist to come back in 3 months. I was also told that my CDE (nurse) was away for a year and was replaced temporarily by someone with whom I have no repertoire. I have yet to find a family doctor with whom I feel comfortable. The one I found recently is on many international panels for Type 2 Diabetes. I thought it would be a great fit. But my questions to him about treating my T1 ended up with a puzzled look on his face. He then told me he doesn't do pap tests and I would have to find another GP to do those tests on me. Back to the drawing board.

In light of all of this, I contacted another diabetes clinic (no endocrinologist, but others on staff), after three calls being returned to me asking me what exactly I want, and being told I will get followed up with. I have given up on trying there too. I am not sure how to explain what I want. I want support, I want to be followed up with. I want someone to look at these thyroid, A1C, and hormone tests and tell me what they mean. I want advice on how to combat my dawn phenomenon without starving myself. And advice on how to micro adjust my night time basals so I don't have to eat almost every night which is making losing weight IMPOSSIBLE. I want someone to tell me they are LISTENING and TAKING ACTION.

I am reaching out in every way possible. I am accountable for every gram of carbs I put in my mouth and exercise 3 times a week at least, I check my sugar 10-12 times a day, I am doing my part. I want someone else with expertise to do theirs.

I am considering putting an RFP** out for a doctor. I would LOVE to have a doctor who actually cares about his/her work so much that they can tell me what they can do for me. It's not hard.

At least I didn't think it was...


**An RFP is a 'request for proposal' in which businesses will bid for clients through clearly explaining how they would complete the project requested in a certain timeframe and budget. It's most commonly used by government departments, but some private clients use it as well.

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Wordless Wednesday: Anti-Bullying

I have a lot of words about the bullying that I, myself receive due to my weight. But I won't even begin to write them, because this lady has said it much better than I could:

Monday, October 1, 2012

Ego.

I like a lot of things. I think this comes as a challenge to me because I am moderately interested in A LOT, so focusing on one thing to make it a passion can be difficult. I don't want to spread myself too thin, and I have a history of picking up hobbies and doing them half-hearted only to be restricted by my other interests.

This doesn't sound like a bad thing, right? Well it's not really. I mean I like and tolerate a lot. I am usually up for any sort of adventure with friends and my boyfriend. I like being active outdoors, playing in mud, hiking, swimming, boating, fishing, bicycling, camping, playing with my dog. I like being indoors and playing video games, reading a good book, colouring, painting, and even (as of yesterday) learning to crochet! I also love shopping, make-up, going for drives, coffee, cooking, nail polish and re-doing furniture. Seems pretty balanced, no?

But honestly, outside of my loved ones and my dog, I can't really say I have found a passion. Something that I am REALLY good at, or something that I desire to be exceptional at. That is a problem for me! When I try something new, and I am only moderately ok at it, I am very quick to give up on myself and move to the next task. I struggle with not excelling at things I try. I know, this is absolutely ridiculous. Nobody is great at something the first time they try it. Nobody. It's not like I need to be told this and it will help me, because I know it already. I know that practice makes perfect, but when I practice I am very hard on myself. If I do not get the results I am aiming for I just file it in the "tried it but whatever" file in my brain.

So, with my new flavour of the month, crocheting I am really looking to get past that. I want to be great at it. I want to excel at something for myself. I want to push past my self-doubt and fear of failure to create something beautiful, if only for myself.

Though I have a project planned. It's lofty and I know that is where my problems can come from, but this project is for a friend I care deeply about. I hope that I can get past my ego and just get down to it! It's a personal challenge.

What do you do that you're great at?

If you click on this link you will see what other D-bloggers are saying..or not saying about themselves.
Courtesy of Ninjabetic.com